What comes from books alone always feels shallow; to truly know a thing, you have to suffer for it.
March
March 2
The recent episodes of Princess Connect! have felt strangely off. The animation has been falling apart more and more too.
What on earth happened, Takaomi Kanasaki?
March 5
I made a major mistake during an experiment today. Absolutely infuriating.
March 7
That bath scene in YuruYuri S3E4, with Kyoko and Yui together, was excellent.
Really, who doesn’t enjoy watching two cute girls bathe together?
March 8
The petite senior girl in the lab really knows how to dress. Way too adorable.
Spring has arrived in Beijing, and with it all kinds of mysterious allergens floating through the air. I’ve been sneezing constantly lately, and my nose is always stuffed up.
March 10
I took a nap at noon hugging my Kanna body pillow, still fragrant from the perfume I sprayed on it in the morning. Pure happiness.
March 13
Got my hands on a custom harmonica from P University’s harmonica club. It seems to be a heavily modified JDR0648.
March 17
Y University’s class schedule is unbelievably inhumane.
The last morning class ends at noon, and the first afternoon class starts at one. For anyone who needs a lunch break and a short nap, it’s a terrible setup.
The to-do list keeps growing longer and longer. I’m getting busier by the day.
March 18
A lot of people around me were delighted by the snow in Beijing, but I’ve never liked it.
I think I’ve mentioned this before: snow here always feels sticky and slushy. The roads end up wet, filthy, and disgusting. I miss the clean, decisive heavy snow back home.
During an experiment, I observed something totally unexpected. I worked overtime until after 3 a.m. and was exhausted.
Postscript: turns out the synthesis had failed and I got the wrong compound. Sigh.
March 19
Beijing is truly dry. The corner of my mouth cracked today, and it hurts like hell.
March 21
A full-scale experimental disaster. I’m in a terrible mood.
March 24
Failed to get the Klee headphones. Annoying.
The weather in Beijing lately has been filthy in every sense. The air pollution has been awful.
Once I graduate, I’m definitely getting out of this cursed place.
March 25
NiceBowl itself has appeared. XD
March 26
Pulled an all-nighter at the lab.
Sigh. I really should avoid working while overloaded like this. I made so many stupid mistakes tonight.
I had planned to start another reaction in the middle of the night, but after thinking it over, I gave up. A person can’t keep making life harder for himself.
Sometimes I wish I had someone to confide in. But wouldn’t that just make them an emotional trash can? That feels disrespectful.
I ordered barbecue delivery, bought a can of beer, and drank alone in the lab.
Numb. Too numb even to watch anime.
March 27
The weather in Beijing was actually pretty nice today—clear skies, perfect for going out.
And yet I had stayed up all night working and spent the entire day asleep in the dorm. Truly something.
Such a healing manga. https://exhentai.org/g/1838549/b51f941431 (AC2) [ルミノシティ (かにビーム)] 私たち、キャルちゃんの猫撫でテクニックで猫堕ちしました。 (プリンセスコネクト!Re:Dive) [中国翻訳]
Back when I was a kid, before smartphones existed, I used to lie in bed every night and carefully review the whole day—what happened, what I gained, what I lost. There was always some new realization waiting there.
Now I just keep scrolling on my phone until the very last bit of energy is gone, then pass out. In that sense, I’m living worse than I used to.
March 28
I was in terrible working condition today. It feels like my energy and spirit are both much weaker than before.
At night I couldn’t sleep. There was this nameless fire inside me, burning so hard my chest hurt. I know perfectly well what the right thing to do is. It’s not that I can’t do it. I just can’t summon the drive. No motivation at all to do anything.
My mental state is still unstable—worse, even, than it was two years ago when I had just started keeping this kind of record.
My fracture has more or less healed, and I’m preparing to write an application to join the Party.
After graduation, I am absolutely not doing research.
March 29
I’ve become more and more irritable and impatient.
April
April 1
Missed out on the Klee headphones again. I’m seething.
I stayed up all night finishing the last few episodes of Princess Connect! Re:Dive Season 2.
The plot was awkward, the dialogue was awkward, the fights were awkward—there were so many things to complain about that I couldn’t even be bothered to list them all.
The only parts that stirred even a little interest in me were those pseudo-corruption scenes, though really it was just puppetization, nothing particularly impressive.
What a bizarre season. It started strong and then collapsed. I’m furious.
April 4
Last night I dreamed, for no reason, that I had suddenly gained a little sister. At night we slept in the same bed, and I couldn’t help kissing and cuddling her.
April 5
By chance I came across a personal website: https://tansongchen.com/
The richness and brilliance of that person’s life left me genuinely envious.
I also watched the first episode of Ya Boy Kongming! and liked it quite a bit.
April 8
Failed yet again to get the Klee headphones. I am even more furious than before.
There’s that unmistakable smell of spring in the air. And yet Beijing’s air still feels grimy to me.
April 10
This season I’m planning to keep up with Ya Boy Kongming! and Kaguya-sama. Both have made a very good first impression.
I recently learned that one of my elementary school teachers was actually an extremely accomplished master of calligraphy and seal carving, and even a member of Xiling Seal Society, which is a very prestigious organization. When I was taking his classes, I had absolutely no idea he had that side to him. Truly hidden depth.
April 11
The male poplars are scattering their seeds into the human world—how free they are.
Today I took a ride-hailing car, and the driver was a retired old Beijinger. While chatting, I learned that he owned three properties in the city. Between his and his wife’s pensions, they get more than ten thousand yuan a month, and renting out their unused home brings in even more. He drives not because he needs the money, but because he wants something to do in retirement.
As he drove, he talked about how people need two things: diligence and a good mindset. He said he especially couldn’t understand why some drivers are always so negative and irritable. In the end he added that health matters most, and that people shouldn’t work themselves too hard.
He definitely meant no harm, and everything he said was reasonable. It’s just that hearing those words from him made them feel strangely unconvincing.
April 12
Even lying down at noon for just a brief ten-minute nap noticeably restores my energy. The human body really is amazing.
I’ve recently developed a new little ritual: after washing a body pillow, it keeps a faint fragrance, and of course you can also spray some perfume on it. Then I bury my face under the skirt of the printed anime girl on the pillow and inhale deeply. Instantly satisfying all kinds of fantasies about cute girls.
April 13
I’ve been preparing for a work qualification exam related to laboratory animals, and it’s made me realize more clearly than ever how much I dislike tedious, dirty experimental work.
Mystery solved: I’m just a lazy dog who longs for glamorous things.
April 15
A new junior arrived in the lab, but he’s actually older than I am. Damn it. There goes my chance to boss him around.
April 16
Anyone who denies the existence of online astroturfing armies has no brain. Anyone who throws around that accusation recklessly has no conscience.
April 17
I finally watched Fate/kaleid liner Prisma Illya: Licht - The Nameless Girl.
The dialogue and plot still carry that classic Fate-style chuuni energy, but regardless—an animated Illya is still the best.
The whole film runs 94 minutes. Back when I was following the manga, I’d read up to about the point covered around the 60-minute mark of the movie. At that time I hadn’t yet started keeping these notes. Nostalgic, really.
Kuro’s exit in the final scene caught me off guard. About two years ago, the manga suddenly took a very dark turn and sparked a lot of discussion; I assume this was the part people were talking about.
I wonder whether Kuro can come back. I’ve heard Illya is later going to return alone to the Age of Gods, which is certainly a wild idea.
In any case, I just hope Hiroshi Hiroyama doesn’t botch the ending and gives everyone a good conclusion.
I should buy a small Illya body pillow one of these days.
The ED for Kaguya-sama Season 3 is pretty interesting too.
Episode 3 of Ya Boy Kongming! was also very good. Eiko is adorable. I only just noticed that the bartender is voiced by Jun Fukushima. I completely failed to recognize him earlier.
In this series, Eiko’s singing parts are performed by 96Neko. The very first song I ever listened to on NetEase Cloud Music back when I was in high school was her version of the Turkish March. The lyrics were playful, and her constantly shifting voice left a strong impression on me.
Later I heard she also sang the opening for Scum’s Wish. I’ve never watched that one, though—people say it’s one of those emotionally chaotic relationship dramas. So I’ll just enjoy 96Neko’s singing here instead.
It’s been a long time since I last spent a late night this happily watching anime. :)
Also: the remake where Azunyan barely gets to do anything actually feels worse than the original from ten years ago.
April 20
Spy x Family is great! The little girl is wonderful.
April 22
Worked all night until 4 a.m. Exhausted.
I also caught up with Miss Kobayashi’s Dragon Maid S2E13. Little girls really are such a blessing. I want Kanna to hold me while I sleep.
April 24
I went back and walked around S University for a while. It really felt like there were noticeably more pretty girls on that campus than at Y University.
Everywhere I looked, there were girls in cute clothes and dresses. Very pleasing to the eye. On that point at least, spring really is a wonderful season.
April 27
The first thing the barber said to me was, “Man, you really don’t have much hair.”
Motivation to leave academia after graduation: +1.